Apr 5, 2009

Ladies, there is good news and bad news.

Good news: you are are not going to turn into your mother.
Bad news: your daughter will.
Posted by at 7:59:00 PM

Apr 2, 2009

No more than 7 syllables.

In my 20's, I thought haiku was bizarre. Now, I insist on it.
Posted by at 8:50:00 PM

I like to get involved.

I'm lobbying the FDA to have appetizers classified as a Food Group.
Posted by at 8:37:00 AM

Twitter-noia

Ever since I signed up for Twitter, I feel like I'm being followed.
Posted by at 8:25:00 AM

NSFA -- Not safe for anywhere.

Unattributed quote to protect the perverted:
"When I surf for porn I hang 10. Then I wipe out."
Posted by at 6:46:00 AM

Back in the day....

I remember when I first heard car alarms I thought,
I can't wait for the day when car thieves learn how to get around that so I don't have to listen to it.
Posted by at 6:38:00 AM

Apr 1, 2009

And I do mean sit.

Text message to Right Wing Evangelicals: I am more than willing to sit through any cure you've got for my being gay on the condition that right afterward, you sit through my cure for your being straight.
Posted by at 4:33:00 PM

Offer expires Monday

Denny's new ad campaign:
Drop in on our Sunday Brunch and eat our scrumptious
We - Found-Something-In - the - Freezer - That - Expires - On - Monday Omelet!
Posted by at 8:23:00 AM
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