Apr 5, 2009

Ladies, there is good news and bad news.

Good news: you are are not going to turn into your mother.
Bad news: your daughter will.
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Apr 2, 2009

No more than 7 syllables.

In my 20's, I thought haiku was bizarre. Now, I insist on it.
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I like to get involved.

I'm lobbying the FDA to have appetizers classified as a Food Group.
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Twitter-noia

Ever since I signed up for Twitter, I feel like I'm being followed.
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NSFA -- Not safe for anywhere.

Unattributed quote to protect the perverted:
"When I surf for porn I hang 10. Then I wipe out."
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Back in the day....

I remember when I first heard car alarms I thought,
I can't wait for the day when car thieves learn how to get around that so I don't have to listen to it.
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Apr 1, 2009

And I do mean sit.

Text message to Right Wing Evangelicals: I am more than willing to sit through any cure you've got for my being gay on the condition that right afterward, you sit through my cure for your being straight.
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Offer expires Monday

Denny's new ad campaign:
Drop in on our Sunday Brunch and eat our scrumptious
We - Found-Something-In - the - Freezer - That - Expires - On - Monday Omelet!
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