Failsafe Way of Finding Osama

Have the Boulder police issue a statement saying Osama bin Laden is a suspect in the Jon Benet Ramsey case. Not only will, CNN will find him in a heartbeat, they'll film him on the plane to the U.S. drinking champagne and watching "Over the Hedge".

Ringtone

I set up a ringtone so I don't have to turn off my phone at the movies.

When my cell phone rings, it whispers "Psst...gimme some of your popcorn..."

Exactl How It Reads On the Label

I called a catalog company to be taken off their mailing list. The woman asked for my name exactly how it reads on the label; I said "Valued Customer".

She asked, "Could you spell that, Mr. Customer?" I said, "Please. Call me Val."