Jul 30, 2005

Can't win.

Don't get involved with a ventriloquist. The arguments are all "Stop putting words in my mouth!"

Jul 26, 2005

Let's get real

The most compelling heterosexual arguments against gay marriage:

  • No matter how good-looking they are, you're not going to like the strippers at the bachelor party.
  • Picturing the honeymoon.
  • No matter where you're from, the wedding is in Massachusetts

The most compelling heterosexual arguments for gay marriage:

  • Reception music you can actually dance to.
  • The straight single women at the reception are really available.
  • 50% of all gay marriages don't have bridesmaids gowns. Lesbians refuse to wear them.