Constitution

These days, I'm less concerned with "Freedom of R eligion"
and more concerned with "Freedom from R eligion".

We've noticed.

Have you ever noticed that when a comedian starts a joke with the phrase "Have you ever noticed..." it's never funny? See?

You Know Who You Are...

Sometimes Honesty isn't the best policy. Sometimes Shut-up is the best policy.

Time Machine

I'll bet when time machines are so common that they're selling them in catalogs, it will still say "Allow 4 to 6 weeks delivery."

Financial Advice

Tim's suggestion:
you really need to pay close attention to when your cash cow starts to crap in your yard.

Red States

Can't help but wonder what the B ible Thumpers think of Hurricane Dennis pounding the crap out of the Red States.

Get Rich Quick Scheme

I'm copyrighting the phrase "Public Domain".